Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Manifesto Bloopers

I've mentioned a couple times my relationship manifesto that Scarlett inspired me to pen. I'm going to share it; but first? Let's drag it out a little bit...

In anticipation for the manifesto, let's share some of the "bloopers" if you will. Things that I was thiiiis close to including. But decided it... would make me look cray I mean make me look like I need therapy I mean... would just be best left out ;)

  • Be an orphan. Because in-laws suck. And husband's lie. And that's a combo I'd rather avoid in round 2 as to avoid a round 3 all together.
  • Have hobbies that don't include me. Because hey, sometimes I need to pull myself out of your ass. But those hobbies should include my dad, grandpa, or brother-in-law. Because hey, husbands can't be trusted on their own.
  • Ball big. Because I've been poor & happy... and poor & miserable. Let's take a look at how green the grass is over on the other side.
  • Dress well. Because I like dragging your ass to photo sessions around every turn & don't have time to dress me, the toddler, AND you. Do it yourself.
  • High sperm count, low sex drive. Because I want more babies but aint nobody really got time for all of that.

Obviously I am kinda
sorta
in a way
a little bit
mostly
OK.. I am totally joking.

Stay tuned, I will be serious about this coming up soon...

1 comment:

  1. Laughed out to a lot of these! :-) Love all your "cross out" humor!

    ReplyDelete

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