Monday, June 23, 2014

Rest

Pat Benatar said "Love is a Battlefield". Y'all, I have been through that war and just barely made it back. I told myself marriage is supposed to be hard, love is supposed to be challenging, nothing that comes easy is worth fighting for ... you know, all those things we are told. If there was a check list of a battlefield kind of love, all my boxes were marked off. And I have the scars to prove it.

If that is in fact what love and marriage is, then count me out. I am not re-enlisting. You can keep my benefits, you can keep the uniform, you can keep the titles and the jewelry. I want none of it. I'm tired. I'm so tired. I can't tell you how many times I've muttered those words: "I'm just so tired" ...


This morning, I read this during my time in She Reads Truth- "Naomi wants to find a husband for Ruth; she wants Ruth to be at rest. And with the right partner, marriage is rest!" Rest. Marriage is rest. With the right partner, marriage is rest!
I had to take a minute after that line because I wasn't even following the rest, that just hit me so hard. Some people say they have "aha" moments. Not me, I had a "duh" moment. Of course ...

I have a tendency of looking around me and saying "this relationship is too easy" and convincing myself it's "too good to be true" and walking away. (Something about a wise girl leaving before she's left?) I'm promising myself right now though that I'm not going to do that anymore. Right now in my life, I am beginning to feel rested and the people around me are easy. I'm going to hold on to that instead of questioning that ...

1 comment:

  1. I literally LOL'd at the "duh moment" part.

    After the last few years... it's most definitely time for a "rest". You deserve it! Don't question it; go with the flow.

    ReplyDelete

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